Connecticut

the first victim was from Connecticut

male in assigned gender

and would have attractions (primarily) to those assigned female at birth.

He was

5 when his father told him to stop “crying like a girl”

7 when he was showed pornography, by the older boys, down the street and

15 when he was called a “faggot” for the status: Virgin.

He was 16 when he (kind of) heard his girlfriend say “no” or was it 
“wait, slow down” (he didn’t).

She was confused though she did not expect to be heard

because she was 6 when she was told to give hugs she did not want

and 10 when she laughed at the boys looking up her skirt.

She was 13 when she learned to make her voice high and breathy and to smile

always smile.

She was 18 and had 10 more experiences like her first until she found

Judith Butler, her voice and an attraction to her college roommate

whom, at 22, she left on the dorm room steps

They were

sad but did not protest because

they expected to be abandoned

they expected to be“novel,” an object with which to “fuck the patriarchy”, at best

but not real

never real

because they were 8 when they whispered “I’m gay” into the ear of the family dog

and 10 when they began to lose hours in front of the mirror searching for a self (a gender) they had never seen.

They were 15 when they accepted that making out was just to help their best friend practice.

This is why they were not surprised, at 22, when she left them for

a gender that was clear

her parents wishes

a nice young man, from Connecticut.

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